Success Through Failure

It’s interesting our tendency to only talk about our successes.

I often experiment when I’m trying out new ideas.  Over the last 20 years or so, I’ve led many youth groups, from Young Life to the church, and I've constantly learned and evolved as the years have gone by.  Much of my learning about leadership was gained through trial and error.  I’d try and fail, then start over again.  Looking back, I can see that my failings far outweigh my successes.  Yet I’m able to talk about my successes only through the lens of my many failures.  Leadership is almost second nature now, but that wasn't always the case.  I've learned a ton along the way.  And much of my learning has been through my failures.

But I don’t often share about my failures.  I tend to only talk about my successes.  I think that's interesting... 

One memorable experience was with a group of untrained leaders from a church I worked with a few years back.  The team was pretty green and there was only a handful who had any experience working with kids - and that was from chaperoning a few youth events - no actual training.  They seemed to believe they knew everything they needed to start a new youth group.  It's always a bit difficult to teach a bunch of know-it-alls - haha - but I was with them.

For whatever reason, they thought it would be super easy to start this new program.  I knew differently because I knew they weren't doing the basics of youth outreach.  We had about ten young leaders and we were starting everything from scratch.  Their plan was to invite kids and have a BBQ.  So our first event was just that: a BBQ in the park.  We bought a ton of hot dogs, brought frisbees - had games planned - and one of our leaders had a talk about God’s goodness ready to go.  The problem was - no one showed up.  Not one kid.

The truth is, I knew this was going to happen.  But I had to lead our team through this “failure” in order for them to experience a wonderful and humbling teaching moment.  After this dismal failure (and embarrassment), they had ears to hear.  I could finally ask the question, “Now, how do we actually get kids to our youth group?” - without any assumptions in the way.  Their perception was that kids would randomly just show up because of some fliers they passed out.  haha.  Good idea, but no.  Now that we had this experience we could really get to work.

The funny thing is that a couple leaders gave up after that crash.  People don’t want to live through failure.  And later, when casting a vision of sharing God’s amazing love to the local high school and jr. high, one leader, in particular, believed it would be impossible.  To be truthful, even the simplest tasks seemed impossible to him.  And his belief created his reality.  It’s definitely difficult working with a pessimist.  The irony is that when he finally decided to quit, our group grew.  And everything he said that was impossible - happened.  Go figure.

But that was almost a planned failure.

Some failures are unpredictable.  I don’t like closing the door to anyone - ever.  Years ago, I had a pretty great Wyldlife team (Jr. High Young Life).  The following year, I opened the door of leadership to literally everyone.  I had 20+ leaders on my team.  It was as diverse a group as you could get.  I wasn’t smart enough, or experienced enough, to lead a team like that.  I was barely 21 at the time.  The team imploded.  Opinions within the team created boundaries and walls that I didn’t know how to break down at my young age.  Let’s just say - it was a disaster.  

But thank God for that disaster - because I learned what not to do. 

Most of my learning is finding out what not to do.  I only learnt that from failure.  My marriage was an epic failure.  And yet it was another opportunity to learn what not to do.  I was a bone-head in a lot of ways.  But - I did learn - and will be better for the next time around (God willing).  

Failures can hurt - but I’m starting to understand that they are so dang important - essential for growth even.  Yet we fear failure like the plague.  Well, I do anyway.

I often read books that seem to skip over failure.  I mean - they point to it here and there, but they mostly camp out on success - success in life, in walking with Jesus, in relationships.  Success is wonderful, don’t get me wrong, but most lives are lived with a ton of failures.  And some people want to give up because of it.  Failure can lead to discouragement and downright depression.  Books on success don't often talk about that.

I think the people who don’t give up and become successful are often the people that fail the most.  We just hear about their amazing success without the crashes and burns, or with just hardly a mention of it.  This isn’t always the case, I’m sure, but I’m betting it’s majority.    

How ironic is it that the majority of success is littered with multiple previous failures?  

And how encouraging too. 

Maybe we should start looking at our failures as the path towards success.  I wonder how different life would be if we looked at it that way...  

Jeremy Kerr

3 and 7 - A Poem

Vision                           God

Dream               Maker

Hope           Life

Truth Breath

Spirit

Word       Way

Flesh               Love

Human                     Action

Jesus                                   Reality





Jeremy K.

Caught in the Middle

I don’t know about you, but for me, the middle is boring.

I recently took a trip down to Southern California.  That is one long drive!  When I finally decided to go, a great excitement rose up within me for this fun adventure awaiting me on the edge of the horizon.  When the hour of leaving finally arrived, my giddiness hit a new level.  I mean, this was different than normal humdrum life.  I had sights to see, friends to catch up with, and lives to be inspired by.  

After driving an hour though, my excitement wore off.  If you’ve ever driven down the middle of California on I-5 you’d understand.  I-5 is pretty boring.  At least the hills were  green this time, but that was only interesting for an hour or so.

After a while, every mile seemed like the same one I’d just driven.  I had my music and my thoughts, but honestly, when you drive, you just sit.  I literally sat in the same spot hour after hour - mile after mile.  This was the exact opposite of exciting.  I knew I was making progress, but it didn’t feel like it.  It was just plain boring.

The middle is boring.

I’ve taught a few people how to play guitar.  Nothing special, just where to place their fingers and how to strum the strings.  I’ve always told students to play five minutes every day, even if they don’t want to, because the discipline of “doing” will eventually help them make progress.  I’ve also told them to beware the “plateau” times because that’s when people give up.  A plateau is a moment within learning where there appears to be no progress.  In guitar, there’s a steep learning curve at the beginning, but then, suddenly, the plateau appears, and thoughts like “I’ll never learn that, it’s too hard” or “this is pointless, I’m not getting any better” start to appear.  And the humdrum of “the same thing over and over again” gets the better of us.  Tons of people give up.  Partly because it’s boring.  When things feel pointless, they become meaningless.  Meaningless and boring are not a good combination.

Stuck in the middle.

So, here I am in the middle of Lent.  I chose to do three things.  I gave up meat.  I thought this would get easier as I went, but - no.  I dream of steak!  I don’t even eat steak that much, but now it’s all I can think about.  Ok - I’m being a little overdramatic, but not by much.  

The second was to post a blog every day.  This has been fun - but I’m stuck in the middle.  I’m driving down I-5 and I’m stuck in a “plateau” with this thing.  It went from joy to obligation without me even noticing.  And now I fight with it.  I’m punching my screen as I type.  really.  k - not really.  But - I am imagining it.  

The third is posting a photo on Instagram.  This turned into obligation right away because I’m not creative like that.  However - looking back, I’m glad I’m doing it.  The joy is only in hindsight.

I wonder if the benefits of discipline can only be seen in the rear view mirror.  I mean, those “pointless” hours of guitar practice helped me to play almost anything I hear now, and I’m so grateful.  And my drive down I-5 eventually got me to the beaches of Santa Barbara and San Diego.  

I had to endure the middle in order to reach the goal.  And, even though it didn’t feel like it, I made progress.  I made progress in the middle of the boring.

Sometimes Christian disciplines are boring.  Studying about Jesus can be like a drive down I-5.  Some church services I’ve attended are worse than driving I-5 - I'd rather be sitting in my car!  

But I wonder if there’s progress we make that we don’t see.  

I think, much of this life is lived in the middle.  Maybe that’s why many people find their life meaningless.  Well, maybe that's one of the reasons.

The “middle” makes me want to give up.  I didn’t post yesterday.  Fail.  The temptation to give up while traveling in the middle is super strong.  Excitement is gone.  The end is not in sight.  Boring...

But I know end will be great.  I know, looking back, I'll be super happy I completed this task.  So I write today.

My fail will be yet another opportunity to practice grace on myself.  And I’ll keep working - moving - plodding along - until the ultimate day of freedom:  Easter - the goal.  

I'm pretty sure I'll be happy looking back.  Well, I know me - and I know I will be - especially with that first bite of steak that hits my mouth.

But discipline to fight through boredom - I wish somehow it were easier!

Have a great day!

Jer

Good Stuff

Wanted to share something good from an old friend.  Super inspiring!

Jer 

Sunday Music #3

Peter Gabriel has been one of my favorite artists ever since I was a little kid.  This was a direct influence from my brother, for sure, and I'm pretty grateful for it.

He has one of the best voices I've ever heard.  Seriously.  And his style is quite unique.  If you only know Peter Gabriel from "Sledgehammer" or "In Your Eyes" - you're missing so much!  Go discover him - his music is pretty dang awesome.

Here's an amazing arrangement of one of my favorite songs - San Jacinto.  It's big sound - so little speakers don't do it justice...

Memories: Christmas Tree Lot - Part 1

Memories...one of my favorites:

A few years back, I got asked to pick up some Christmas trees from Portland, Oregon and drive them down to California.  It was for our annual Christmas tree lot that benefited our local Young Life club. I was virtually broke (less than $30 in the bank) and had nothing better to do, so I said yes.

My buddy Dylan also got to tag along. He was only a couple years out of High School (barely drinking age) and I was pushing thirty. I met Dylan when he was a little Jr High kid. We fast became friends and have been ever since.

____________________________

One time, while he was in High School, he took me on a tour of where he grew up, somewhere in the middle of Sacramento. His mom worked in the Capitol building at the time, and we got a tour of the whole place. This was during the grunge-scene era. I was in my early 20’s and looked the part: long hair, flannel shirt - just a general mess. I felt so out of place as we took the tour of the Capitol - getting a behind the scene look at the political class.

A few scenes are etched in my memory from that day.  One was riding the elevator within the capitol building. The walls of the elevator reflected back at us like a mirror. Here I was - Mr. Grunge boy in his mid twenties with a couple high school kids (Sam and Dylan) - and we found ourselves standing in a mirrored box with perfectly groomed men in expensive suits and very fashionable women in their business attire. They all looked so important! And they probably were.  I felt so out of place (as always). I’m sure they must have wondered what we were doing in the Capitol building. I looked one step away from homeless.  It was a very self conscious ride.

Another funny scene happened in Downtown Sac. There was this building that had a pillar with water falling from it, giving a kind of waterfall effect. Being stupid kids, we started splashing each other from the falling water. I’ll never forget - this elderly woman came up to us and said with a stern and angry voice “Bums pee in that water!” and then just walked away. Talk about random.  And like that would stop us! Lots of laughter and completely drenched, we adventured on.

Fun times...

_______________________________

Anyway - years later - Dylan and I headed to the airport on our little mission to get trees from Portland. I think Dylan had less than $10 on him (which was actually a lot for him) and I was broke too. We were always broke, but that never seemed to stop us from experiencing amazing stories that we'd later share with our friends, embellishing them like we were poets of old.

I had a Young Life Credit Card (to pay for our truck and gas on the way down) but that was it. Broke and willing - we were ready for whatever was in front of us.  This was supposed to be a very simple trip: get the trees, make a stop in Reno to drop their trees off at a local High School (Reno YL), then head home with the remainder of trees to El Dorado Hills.

This is a phenomenon that happens to me a lot.  I never know details.

When we got on the plane - I felt completely and totally clueless. We had vague instructions to meet someone we didn't know at the airport - but that’s about it.  So often, I wonder how I’m gonna get from point A to point B. I have continually led trips throughout the years and kids always ask, “where are we going?" and "what are we going to do when we get there?” or some such question - they're always pushing for details. I pretty much always reply with, “I have no idea??” and I’m usually being honest (I think they believe I’m lying to them. ha!)  The funny thing is that it has worked out so many times that I don’t really even worry anymore. I mean, I get a little nervous if I start thinking about my cluelessness, but somehow things always come together.

We arrived at the Portland airport early in the morning with no bags to retrieve and no idea where we were going. As we walked off the plane and into the gate area, a random lady somehow recognized us and asked if we were from Young Life. (this was just prior to the 911 craziness when people could actually meet each other right off the plane).

Come to think of it, I believe she had a sign, and we walked towards her as she spoke. After introductions, she asked us, “Do you guys want to go to breakfast?” Well. ummm. This was that awkward moment when we had confess we had no money. I think we mumbled something like “maybe McDonalds, cuz it’s all we can afford.” And she replied, “Nonsense! I’ll take you out - on me.” Score!!

So we ate at this little hole in the wall diner in the middle of nowhere. This has to be mentioned: It was in the middle of winter and it was pretty darn cold. Dylan was wearing shorts, a T-shirt, and a bathrobe that he used as a coat. Yep, that's right, a bathrobe. Just...wow. He believed that he could start a new trend with everyone wearing bathrobes. He was in the last few years of his youth when he thought everything he did was perceived as “cool”. I think this was the turning point of becoming “not so cool.” ha!

We got a table in the diner and Dylan noticed the name tag of the waitress that was serving us. It was something like Margery. He started talking to her - and every sentence he used her name. “How are you doing Margery...” “Well, Margery, this menu looks really good. How are the pancakes Margery...” “Margery, what would you get if you were eating here?” etc. It always hard not to laugh when he gets in these moods. I’m always embarrassed to do things like that - but he had a better perspective - he knew we would never see these people again.

We ate our meal, and afterwards our guide drove us to the truck rental place. I was thinking the truck that was ordered for us was going to be some short u-haul truck dealy, but when they showed us the truck we’d be driving, my mouth hit the floor. It was giant! Literally the biggest truck that they had. I wasn’t even sure if I had a license to drive such a beast. I was used to driving 15 passenger vans all over the place, but this was ridiculous. It was a truck truck. Oh boy.

Dylan and I hopped in and started following our guide towards the Christmas tree farm. I was white knuckling it because the streets I was driving were very populated - cars, bikes, and lots of people were everywhere. And we were in a beast. The sides of the truck felt like they were spilling into the other lanes.

As we drove, the landscape got more rural and rural until we finally made it to the tree farm...

to be continued...

Super Hero Names

My buddies and I actually have comic book names for each other.  Kind of like super hero names.  But instead of the name reflecting on a super amazing attribute of our character – it focuses instead on a somewhat negative (or humorous)  attribute.  It seriously makes me laugh just thinking about it.  

Matt is known as the Morpher.  He’s one of my best friends and I’ve known him forever.  He tends to go the extreme of whatever he is doing at the time.  And he tends to turn into the personalities that surround him.  If he hangs out with religious people, he becomes religious.  If he hangs out with stoners, he becomes a stoner.  If he’s at work too much, life’s all about work.  If he’s at play too much – everything is play.  Lately he’s become talk radio.  He morphes into whatever he’s exposed to.  In some ways, he’s a walking reflection of what’s going on in his life.  My buddy Dylan and I laugh about it.

Dylan is known as Ultimate Rage Boy.  I witnessed this first hand with him and his brother.  He used to get so angry at his brother – I thought veins would burst out of his neck.  Dylan’s the type of guy that will be late to every meeting you have with him – but if you’re 5 minutes late to his meeting – yer on his shit list.  It’s so stinkin’ funny.  One instant he’ll have ultimate rage – the next he’ll be drawing cartoons - he’s definitely one of my most creative friends.  

He’s also the Story Teller.  His stories are sooooo funny!! – and unbelievable.  If he could capture the stories he tells in a book, I’d be the first to buy it.   I never laugh harder than when I listen to his stories.  In fact, the last time I cried from laughter, I was listening to one of his crazy tales about this mean boss that literally crapped his pants while they were working.  

I’m not sure their super hero/comic book name for me.  They’ve never shared it if I have one.  I have a couple guesses.  

One might be the Vanisher.  I can be very present in people’s lives, but then can disappear like I never existed.  It’s part of my introverted personality.  I can be alone for days at a time and hardly even notice.  It doesn’t mean that people aren’t in my thoughts and prayers – it just means I’m not actually present in their lives.  This is definitely a relational aspect of my life that I need to get better at.  I could see them giving me some kind of nickname like that. 

More likely it’s Jerk.  It’s a nickname that I picked up in high school and now carry around with pride.  It has to do with my first name being Jer – and my last name starting with a K.  Jer (k).  I think it’s opposite to my personality, but - maybe not???  It’s nice to start off being known as a jerk because people’s idea of who you are can only go up from there. 

It could also be known as the Talker.  I can talk people’s ears off sometimes because I can’t stop thinking in my alone times and when my mouth opens up with friends - my thoughts come rushing out.  My mind just doesn’t stop - it’s annoying!  Verbal diarrhea can often be the result.  I’m definitely a verbal processor and my patient friends are often on the receiving end of that mess.  haha.

We all have both positive and negative attributes.  It’s how we’re wired. 

One of my favorites is a reflectional attribute that everyone on the planet shares.  We are sons and daughters of the King.  And not just any King - but the one that touches the other side of the universe at this very moment.  People reflect His goodness all the time in a rainbow of colors.  It’s truly awesome.  And He has nicknames for us as well.  I wonder what they are??

Jesus gave nicknames in the scriptures.  Peter (the one who denied Him, and excluded non-jews from fellowship even after the resurrection) was known as the “Rock.”  I think that’s funny.  While there’s the whole “potential” perspective (which Peter strived to live up to) - there’s also God’s humor.  Peter was anything but a rock.

I’m naturally a ditcher.  If things get hard - I’m out!  I avoid conflict like the plague.  God’s nickname for me probably has something to do with being steady and faithful.  hahaha.

Matt’s is probably something about his individualism.  Something like “One of a kind” or “Diamond in the rough.”  

Dylan’s is probably “Calm Ocean” or some such soothing nickname. 

God definitely sees stuff inside of us that we can’t see.  But He’s also just plain funny.  And He’s at work! 

Two of Jesus’ friends were known as “sons of thunder”.  One of them became known as the apostle of love - John.  Transformation.  Hmmm.  Kinda like the caterpillar and the butterfly.

I wonder what we’re turning into??

Fun thoughts...

What do you think God’s nickname is for you?  What’s your super hero name?

Jer

Random Surprise

Today was a long travel day - lots of driving.  

The coast of California is pretty dang gorgeous though.  I’m used to driving up I-5, and that is a typically boring drive.  This time I went up the 101, then the PCH to get to Santa Cruz - where there are gorgeous views of the mountains, with occasional bursts of jaw-dropping ocean views.

My grandma lived in Aptos (next to Santa Cruz) and as a kid I would always love driving up there to visit and explore.  One of my traditions whenever I’m in the Santa Cruz area is to go to a little coffee shop in Capitola called Mr. Toots.  I’ve been going here for what seems like forever.  I LOVE their cheesecake!  It’s a cool little second story coffee shop that overlooks the ocean and the coast.  Some traditions are not meant to be broken, so that’s the first place I went.

I pulled out my camera to take a picture of the door of Mr. Toots to put it on Instagram.  As I climbed the steps and was busy posting it, I walked inside, to my surprise, one of my old friends was the barista!

How wonderful is that? And random?  I was just thinkin’ I was buying time before I saw one of my other friends that lives in the area.  But, here was this old friend.  We quickly caught up about our lives, and eventually our conversation turned towards God’s goodness.  She told me that those days of YL were some of the best in her life.  It was fun to be able to reaffirm that no matter what happens in our life, we are NEVER disqualified for God’s love and grace.

It’s sad that we often forget that!  I know I do.  Somehow I come up with this silly notion that I can be disqualified from His infinite love.  Just having this conversation with Maddi reminded me that we’re not.  I’m not.  What an awesome surprise!

God is so random.  I love it.

Makes me wonder yet again what's around the corner...

Jer

Thoughts From a Graveyard

Our shadows stretched towards the tombstones as I took photos.  There were hundreds and hundreds of them.  Infants to ancients.  Death does not discriminate.

For some, I'm sure death was a complete surprise.  For others, it was the end of a very long battle.  All their worries - vanished.  All their struggles - gone.  All their angers - silenced.

The graveyard was quiet and peaceful overlooking the Southern California ocean.  It was beautiful.

The hustle and bustle of the world moved on and on around them every day.  People busy with living.  In some ways, it's funny what we worry about (or get worked up about) in our lives.  Life passes by and we often waste time with worry, anger, and judgement.

Some of the dead probably had very strong political beliefs.  Some preferred one group of people over another.  Some believed in God while others rolled their eyes.

But all were gone.  Whatever worries, angers, or beliefs they held onto in life were silenced at the grave (at least, from the perspective of the living).

The grave is very real for you and me.  We want to not think about it - avoid it - deny it.  But - we have a final resting place somewhere too.

What are we wasting time in our life with right now?  How much petty anger or worry to do we hold onto each day we live?  Ultimately, that crap that won't matter one bit when we lie down in our final resting place.

For me, this is motivation to love more.  Relationships are so important.  That's what we'll remember when we're dying - relationships.  Don't ya think?

They're messy though.  There's a lot of risk.  I should know.  I risked a marriage - and it crashed and burned.  But, looking back, I'm thankful for that chance at optimism.  I am a better person because of it all.  But there was pain.  And pain creates conflict and tension.  Risk.

I think we all get hurt in relationships.  Jesus did.  Why do we think we might get a pass when the whole premise of the Great Story was a broken relationship - reconciled and restored by the One that died a brutal death on a cross?  God risked everything for relationship.  And what an amazing story He's telling through it all!

We risk a lot in relationships too.  We often say they're the most important thing.  But are they really?  Words and actions often disagree.

"When all is said and done - mostly things are just said, and not much is done." T. Campolo.

Take time to risk today!  Love!  And put your petty anger and worry to the grave.  Love does!  Go risk loving people!

That's what I'm gonna try to do today!

Jer

Time to Reflect and Dream

I don’t know where I am.  

I’m in the middle of a town that I don’t know the name of - at a random Starbucks somewhere near San Diego - but if you took my phone away, I’d be completely lost. 

I have no agenda today.  I’m gonna get a tour of San Diego a little bit later, but this morning - nothing.  I know nobody here.  I am sort of a fly in the wall.  I’m an extra in the lives of random people in Southern California. 

I’m spending my morning reflecting on the conference I just attended.  It was an inspiring and “kick in the butt” type conference.  At least, for me it was.  

The conference kind of told me what I already know:  I don’t know where I am.

Or maybe, “I don’t know where I’m going” would be a better way of putting it.  

I definitely choose stories with meaningless ambitions.  Somehow, in my past, I was swept up into the incredible story of the gospel.  Had I not lucked out on that - I wonder how my life would have turned out?  Because without the gospel, I’d just chase one selfish ambition after the next.  I do that WITH the gospel - how much more without?

Much of what I learned this past weekend were things that I already knew, but couldn’t put my finger on.  For example, here’s some of the basics of story:

A good story is clear.  A character is known for what they do, not what they think. (Love Does!)  There’s no good story without conflict.  Great characters engage conflict.  The only way a character can change in a story is through conflict.  Great characters go through transformation.  Great characters live stories where many lives are saved.

There was much more, but that’s pretty much the basics.  Common sense stuff.  But one of the challenging questions of the conference was:  

What kind of story are you telling with your life?

Another was: 

What would the world miss if you didn’t tell your story?

I find that I often choose boring and meaningless stories.  hmmm. 

None of these ideas made me feel guilty - not even close!  It was more - wow - I settle for less than I know I can get in life.  Not that I’m trying to “get” anything - but I settle for a good - or ok - life instead of the very best life that I'm wired to live.  I settle.

A woman that worked with elderly people who were nearing death's door wrote a book about her experience.  I wish I had written the name of the book down, but I didn’t.  I just wrote the list:

The top 5 regrets of the dying:

1. They ignored their dreams
2. They worked too much
3. They didn’t say what they really thought
4. They wished they had more friends
5. They wished they had chosen to be more happy.

I hope to live life without these regrets.  But I need to start living a better story if that's to happen.  

Well - here's to challenges!  Time to reflect and dream...

May we learn to live better stories with our lives!!

Jer

Sunday Music #2

Sometimes there aren’t answers to the questions we have.  Sometimes we are speechless with pain.  Sometimes life just plain sucks.    

There’ve been a couple deaths recently in my hometown.  When we look towards Jesus - He just weeps.  But - the questions remain.

One of my favorite songs hints of hope in this desperately hurting world.  It doesn’t give answers, but there’s hope nonetheless.  

Jer

Chasing the Sun

The sky was like fire the other night as the sun fell into the ocean - and we ran to catch it.  I was quickly out of breath - and not because of the beauty.  I am, by no means, a runner.  And to help prove the point, I was clutching my Cinnamon Dulce Latte as I chugged along.  I’m not one for common sense, so my friend Sarah had to point out that I should probably plug the hole of my cup’s lid with my finger as I ran.  “Ohhh! That’s why it’s spilling.” I thought.  haha.  

When you’re out of shape, you can’t breath deep enough to suck the energy you need to keep going.  So - we’d walk, then go, then walk again, then go again.  We even laughed because it was so silly.  Sarah is super athletic, but hates running.  (Well, that’s what she told me anyway, but it’s probably to make me feel better - ha!)  And I am just plain out of shape.  Like I said - the two of us - silly.  And - laughing, while running and holding a coffee?  Not the best combo.

But we kept pushing.  We got some great photos of the setting sun from far away, but we wanted to get to a point where the cliff’s edge opened up and revealed that fiery ball melting into the ocean’s horizon.  

When we finally got to the cliff’s edge, we’d missed it.  We were literally seconds late.  We could barely make out the very top the the sun disappearing into the water, but we missed the full sunset.  It was an “Oh well.” moment and Sarah reassured me, “It’s still really pretty without the sun.”  She was very right. (even though she does of that habit of trying to make the people around her feel better - I secretly think I missed the coolest thing ever!  haha.)

The sky was various shades of red.  The ocean’s water was a strange blue, almost turquoise, and the color orange danced inside the waves.  It was beautiful.  Stunning beautiful.  I don’t live near the ocean - so it was sort of like seeing something with brand new eyes.  I think that’s how we’ll see heaven - with brand new eyes.  

I wonder...how much am I missing in life?  hmmm...

There were other people watching this scene with us.  It’s crazy to think that this scene gets played out over and over again:  the light of day kissing the darkness goodnight.  And even crazier -  God is such a good artist that He’s never content to paint the same painting night after night.  Sarah showed me some photos of another evening that revealed even deeper oranges and reds that shined across the expanse of the sky - a more beautiful night than the one we were witnessing.  Truly amazing.  She said, “you should have seen it in person.  There was every color of the rainbow!  The photo doesn’t do it justice”

What an amazing artist that God is!  Seriously.  How much am I closing my eyes to His stunning beauty?  Makes me wonder... 

Jer

Sharing thoughts...

Always want to share some good thoughts - and this particular blog entry has been workin' on me...


http://storylineblog.com/2013/02/19/how-i-learned-not-to-be-overwhelmed/

Comfort Zone

I'm sittin' on the rooftop at a house in Santa Barbara.  The ocean is amazing!  The wind has just the slightest bite of cold that's pretty much cancelled out from the hot coffee that I'm sipping. I'm literally watching a plane flying really low - only a couple hundred feet above the water - a huge plane - passing by to some unknown destination. Amazing.

It's pretty quiet, except for the birds chirping and occasional car driving by.  I can see waves roll toward the beach through the trees.  An unnatural looking oil rig sits off the coast.  Behind me are mountains.  Huge mountains.  There are palm trees and unknown types of coastal trees all around.  The sun is high in the sky - making this computer screen hard to see.

I wonder if stepping outside our "normal' heightens our senses.  I normally don't notice anything.  Today is a new day - a new place - a new adventure.  And I'm noticing things.

I think I strive for comfortable too much.  Some of my story could be "the search for comfortable."  It's not that comfortable is necessarily bad.  It's more that it's settling for 'not great."

Maybe too much comfort is bad.  I tend to avoid confrontation.  It's uncomfortable.  But - that has turned out badly too many times.  Too much comfort can lead to laziness too - which can also turn out bad.  People often talk about "getting outside of your comfort zone."  I think, in some ways, all we try to do is live within our comfort zone.  I wonder if true growth can occur within our comfort zone.  I'm not so sure...

Fear is a motivating factor - fear of the unknown.  Going outside our comfort zone can create fear.  I think I fall for that fear more often than I'd like to admit.  I can tell a great story - but can I live one?  Maybe that's what this trip is all about.  Learning to live a great story.  Great stories are rarely comfortable ones.

It's sad how often I settle for "less than great."

Jer

Instantly Friends!

Got all my bags packed - at Starbucks - getting ready for this travel adventure to Southern California.

Long drive today - 7 hours to Santa Barbara.  Going to stay with a friend for the next couple days before heading off to San Diego.  Tonight I'm going to a college group, really looking forward to it.  I love hearing God type thoughts through different lenses.  Praying I'm not too cynical.  haha!  Cynicism can blind us from God - and that's ugly habit I have.  "Blind me from cynicism!!"  As long as I remember that - I'm usually ok.  usually....ha

Hopefully traffic won't be too bad.  I've only been to Santa Barbara twice, and both times I was pretty much just driving through.  This will be fun.  Tomorrow is explore times.  I'm actually looking forward to the pre-trip as much as the San Diego part.  I love new!  And - my friend from SB kicks A and takes names!!

I read a chapter from Donald Miller's book today about Bob Goff.  It's the chapter about kayaking next to Malibu (Canada - Young Life camp), and hearing Bob's story about world leaders for the first time.  It's kinda a must read.  Makes me believe that almost anything is possible.  Such an inspiring story!!  They used the word "whimsy".  I kinda feel like this trip has a bit of "whimsy' in it.

I'm not one for details.  I always figure that the details will work themselves out.  And - they usually do!! I don't even know the family that I'm staying with down in San Diego.  My buddy is leaving for a Men's retreat for his church while I stay in his rented room.  Random.  He's coming back on Sunday and we're gonna hang out for a couple days.  But - awkward moments.  I hate not knowing people.  haha.  Well - time to make new friends.

Remember making friends when you were a kid?  If you saw a kid playing and walked up to them to play too - you were instantly friends. So easy!  Strange how things change.  Sad how things change - in that regard.  Maybe this is one of those instances that Jesus was referring to when he talked about people having to be like kids to enter the kingdom of heaven.  Heaven is full of friends - I'm sure!

Sometimes the word foolishness creeps in my head when doing random stuff like this trip.  It's a fear based thought.  Weird how often I fight fear.  Fear of the unknown.  Fear of new people.  Fear of failure.  Fear of losing all my money.  haha.  I'm always a bit comforted when I think of Jesus so often saying, "Fear not!".

I have nothing but addresses as I go south.  The address in Santa Barbara - and the address in San Diego.  Only have two phone numbers too.  But - that's about it.  haha.  Whimsy.  Gotta love it.  Well - here goes.  Let's see what kind of story opens up.  Woohoo!

Jer